Stila Galmoureyes Mascara

Do you like drinking? Then please don’t buy this mascara.

It’s fantastic going on. Made my lashes long and beautiful and full, just like Beyonce’s.  Then, one night, I had two glasses of Malbec** and fell asleep with a full face of makeup.

I would have preferred to wake up to an under-eye black with smudgy, gross mascara, as per usual. Instead, mascara flakes infiltrated my eye, then scratched the fuck out of my eye. It took me 10 minutes to fish the mascara reminents out from under my eye lids, squeeze them out from the sides of my eye balls  and remove as much remaining mascara from my lashes as I could.

I know you’re not supposed to go to bed with eye makeup on, but c’mon! I’ve fallen asleep with Bobbi Brown and Nars mascara and has NEVER HAPPENED! I just wake up with a real gross, sad face. That’s it! None of this “tiny knives in my eyes” bullshit.

Maybe you’ve had a different experience with Stila Galmoureyes Mascara? Or a similar one? E-mail or comment …. if you can still see.

** I don’t drink, so just to put this in perspective, this is equal to a grown Texas ranch man drinking a fifth of Jack Daniels.